-Award winning author-

ANTHONY ARVIN

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Quotes, Notes and Quips

People who think themselves tactful often are not.

People who think they are not critical often are.

People who think they are cool usually aren’t, and

people who think they are smart rarely are.

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We are projectors. 

We think we are observers, but we frequently project onto others what we choose to believe ... then we hold them responsible for the motives that we have projected onto them.

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When you are struggling in life, the solution can usually be found in things you are just certain are not the problem...

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In our youth, we placed faith in the words of those we respected. With experience, we learned to judge people more by their actions. But, as you gain wisdom, you learn to see the inevitability of people’s patterns.

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Those who suffer most from criticism are often quietly--but intensely--critical of others. When you see others through harshly critical eyes, you expect that everyone else is judging you in kind.

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A person who does not feel respected does not feel loved. As people become more familiar with each other’s faults, respect sometimes suffers. If respect declines, love diminishes proportionately. Someone who has gone through a bitter divorce won’t tell you how they fell out of love. They will give you the grocery list of things that made them lose respect for the other.

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For some people, anger is one of the primary tools in their toolbox of “people handling skills.” However, like dynamite, anger’s usefulness is limited. Few things are made better by blowing them up.

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Assumptions are cunning little buggers. They love to dress up, to appear credible, then go out and parade around as facts. 

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What you dwell on will control you, and if you dwell on something long enough, it will begin to define you.

Great. I’m going to be an Oreo.

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When reality repeatedly bites you in the butt, faulty assumptions can usually be found lurking nearby.

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Make decisions based upon what you want your life to be twenty years from now, not on what you want to indulge in at the moment. If you live only in the moment, your future will be a series of events over which you seem to have no control.

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When you are old and are looking back over your life, you will see that the small, nagging problems—those which were very much within your power to resolve—were the ones that stole your happiness.

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When you choose to hold everyone in high regard … you will be amazed to see how many other problems in your life just mysteriously go away,

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Cynicism is a popular endeavor, but it is a destructive force. It only tears down; it never builds or improves its target.

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Our soul cannot find peace when it rests on a foundation of arrogant, ignorant or immature beliefs. Reflection and humility are required to bring maturity and wisdom to our beliefs, and peace to our soul.

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Just like gravity binds you to the earth, anger binds you to the people you resent. Only forgiveness breaks that bond.

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The most secure prison on the planet doesn’t have walls…it is guarded only by the fear of what others think of us.

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An old adage says that “Still waters run deep,” implying, of course, that quiet people are smart. But I’ve also noticed that—on occasion—Still waters smell like a swamp,  Sometimes the hamster just can’t figure out the wheel.

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Wisdom can usually be found hanging around with simplicity and tranquility.

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People who are easily offended also tend to be habitually insecure.

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We shouldn’t be dismissive of facts just because they don’t agree with our conclusions.

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Often it is late in life before we realize that we have wanted the affection of the wrong people. I have found just as many wonderful and deserving people at the lower rungs of society’s ladder as the top.

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Begin to look for the good in people, and begin to elevate everyone.

 

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Love, like respect and honorable behavior, should not be conditional.

 

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Good salesmen know when to speak up. 

Great salesmen know when to shut up.

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Be careful of misinformation created by people who want to manipulate you.  Learning requires diligence and discernment.

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We spend the apprenticeship years learning the rules, and our journeyman years following those rules. But, with mastery, we learn how to use the exceptions to those rules to our advantage.

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© 2019 by Tony Oliver